The opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
real people areself conscious. They avoid blaming others for their own mistakes and accept their strengths and weaknesses. They show vulnerability by opening up to others and connecting with people on a deep level.
Inauthentic people are the complete opposite.
Simply put, inauthentic people are fake. Sometimes people start adopting inauthentic traits because they feel pressured to be what they are not, or they think it will help increase their chances of being that.Successful. We all know that appearances are important. But people who are inauthentic have lost their way, and their falseness is toxic to themselves and the people around them.
To help you distinguish between someone who is genuine and someone who is faking it, here are 9 telltale traits of inauthentic people.
Related:10 behaviors of genuine people
1. They are usually full of themselves.
Inauthentic people like to show off. They have a high opinion of themselves and want to make sure everyone around them sees how good they are. They see others as be under them. They are often the peacock of their group, the one who struts and shows off and who can't stand it when others show them off. They have put up a false front and are even starting to believe their own lies.
Underneath their carefully curated exterior, however, they may be struggling with low self-esteem. They use their puffyegoand vanity to cover up their inadequacies, and they dare not look too deep within themselves. An inauthentic person seeks to hide their flaws and become stronger. They don't like people to question them for fear of finding out the truth. True humility comes when you know and accept yourself, flaws and all.
Related:5 horrible traits that turn people off
2. They are manipulative and critical.
Inauthentic people can be very judgmental of others, often as a way to gain control. An inauthentic person will constantly be trying to gain advantage or validation from others bymanipulatingthose around you. But at the same time, they are unlikely to solve any problems head-on. Instead, they're looking for ways to make themselves look more important.
Your energy is focused on empowering yourself and destroying others. That's why they are experts at being passive-aggressive and giving backhanded compliments. If they feel threatened or ignored, they will do whatever it takes to refocus attention on themselves or divert any negative outcomes they may encounter.
Related:9 Signs You're Dealing With an Emotional Manipulator
3. They don't express their emotions freely and clearly.
Inauthentic people don't know how to deal with their emotions, so they tend to be aggressive with others as a way to hide their own feelings.
Because inauthentic people don't understand what it means to be true to themselves, they end up running away from who they really are. They are unable to express what they really feel because they have isolated themselves from their deepest emotions, probably because they are afraid of what they might find there.
Maybe they believe that in order to get the things they want, they have to be willing to lie, cheat, and break the rules. This also explains why fake people are often two-faced, showing their friends one side of themselves and then talking about them behind their backs. But they rarely spoke such truths to a friend's face, preferring instead to maintain the appearance of being kind to everyone.
Related:Have you noticed the similarities between toxic business leaders and politicians?
4. They are not interested in learning from their mistakes.
Inauthentic people focus on looking good. They aren't too concerned with the actual quality of their character or trying to improve or become more trustworthy.
They also tend to hold grudges against others, as forgiving would mean having the humility to see that no one is perfect. In their mind they are perfect and everyone else falls short.
This is why inauthentic people cannot learn for themselves.mistakes. They have a hard time admitting to any faults or mistakes. They will blame others or make excuses; it will always be someone else's fault who failed. They will never truly learn the important lessons associated with making mistakes, and this will hold them back from achieving true success.
Related:12 ways successful people deal with toxic people
5. Having unrealistic perceptions.
This is one of the main reasons why fake people are sotoxic: They are often wrapped up in materialism because, in their world, the "stuff" that fills their lives is a true reflection of how successful they are.
They are often more interested in collecting "stuff" they can brag about than working to develop lasting, meaningful relationships. Having a deep connection or friendship with others would require them to also be in touch with their thoughts and feelings.
Because they keep things superficial, they also have a limited view of the world. They focus on money and wealth. They focus on what others can do for them. Seeing things through this distorted lens, they make decisions and build their lives based on misperceptions.
Related:To Succeed, Stay Away From These 7 Types of Toxic People
6. They grab attention and please people.
Inauthentic people have a need to do everyone likes them, or at least notices them. Above all, they can't stand to be ignored. They are willing to do and say almost anything in their quest for others' approval, confirmation, or affection.
They can come across as needy at times and can have an annoying habit of constantly changing or retroactively adjusting what they say for fear that someone will take it the wrong way.
However, any kindness or hospitality they show others is an act and is likely designed to manipulate others into a larger scheme that they believe will give them an advantage in some way. Inauthentic people miss the point of disinterested benevolence orphilanthropy.
Related:10 Ways Pleasures Suck Which Always Backfires
7. Have a hostile sense of humor.
Beneath that fake smile, an inauthentic person is harboring resentment and anger towards those around them. They see the world through a cynical lens because they don't trust anyone. Their default button is set to sarcasm and they use teasing as a way to boost their self-esteem. They find it easier to put others down with a rough joke or a snarky quip than self-deprecating humor.
This hostile sense of humor may make them appear smart or sly, but it's actually masking their insecurity and anxiety. Jokes and jokes told by an inauthentic person are really distracting - they don't want anyone looking too closely at their own flaws.
Related:9 tips to help you live peacefully with difficult people
8. Lack of consistency.
One of the characteristics of an inauthentic person is the lack ofcore valuesand the inability to stay on track and stay focused. They often jump from one thing to the next, never giving their all on any one project, getting too scattered trying to do everything and be everywhere.
They miss deadlines and make excuses or blame others, but it's really a lack of consistency on their part. All this inconsistency leaves a great deal of confusion in its wake as they really don't know what they stand for. They constantly get bogged down in minutiae as they try to micromanage everything without recognizing what the most important goals are.
Related:How establishing core values leads to success
9. Isolate yourself in your own clique.
Inauthentic people often take advantage of a situation through mob mentality. They look for ways to influence their peers through the use of emotion rather than logic or intellectual reasoning. They are happy to piss others off for something, especially if it benefits them in some way. They are likely trying to maneuver into a position of greater authority or control.
Fake people usually isolate themselves inside a panel. These cliques often place social pressure on others to conform to their ideas, which serves to reinforce their preconceived notions. This is because inauthentic people are not open-minded and do not want others to question their motives or ideals.
- Keep a healthy distance. ...
- Don't play into their follies. ...
- Remember that it's never about you. ...
- Stay above all the ruckus. ...
- Be honest. ...
- Be a friend. ...
- Seek out help.
- They speak in absolutes, such as 'always' and 'never. ...
- They brag by downplaying their accomplishments. ...
- They try to please you by judging people you both know. ...
- They're highly defensive. ...
- They love to debate. ...
- They talk too much and say too little.
Inauthentic and perfectionistic behaviours are believed to develop in childhood. The child ultimately disregards their intrinsic needs and desires, and instead devotes their energy to meet the needs and expectations of others. They are hypervigilant to what is needed to gain a sense of belonging.What is the difference between genuine and fake person? ›
Genuine people act guided by their beliefs. They do not care if their good actions receive any recognition. Fake people do not act based on their beliefs but rather in the pursuit of recognition. They do good things to be recognized and applauded.What makes a person disingenuous? ›
Someone who is disingenuous is slightly dishonest and insincere in what they say. It would be disingenuous to claim that this is great art.How do you know if you're inauthentic? ›
If you aren't living in alignment with your truth, you are not being authentic. Inauthenticity can make a person feel resentment, depression, boredom, anger, and a slew of other unhappy feelings. You may feel irritated by or jealous of someone who is living their life in more authentic ways.What is inauthentic behavior? ›
Engage in or claim to engage in inauthentic behavior, which is defined as the use of Facebook or Instagram assets (accounts, Pages, Groups, or Events), to mislead people or Facebook: About the identity, purpose, or origin of the entity that they represent.